I had been wrestling with a project at work for almost 2 weeks now to the point of obsessing over it and not getting restful sleep - not that I had been getting any ever since Zaki has occupied almost half of the bed between mum and me. Or has it been ages even before that, probably.
Anyway, regarding the project, I had kept reading and referencing stuff and other materials every time I am in front of the computer which is something I'm proud to be quite adept at already. Yet offline, my brain still seems to function as if it were processing data on every possible outcome of the project - the answer to which is still hanging even as I write this piece. It is paralyzing, really and as a consequence, I am not able to fully appreciate time and life as a whole. It is easy to cry for a break but doing so is a different matter - especially when the reins are coming from inside. Mental, as we all would say.
Which has led me to again to tap into that internal resource for coping well which isn't as easy as pushing buttons but then events and surroundings have a peculiar way of offering help. Here goes:
1. It's back to school time for Zaki starting yesterday and how lovely it is to see school premises and bolted gates to keep kids from leaving (and parents from staying) again. New shoes, uniform and polished new smiles from kids who again embark on new adventures holding loads of books and unbelievably big luggages. So? They do have these different bags (Zaki's got Marvel Avengers :) yet none of the baggages. You see open hearts and open minds. Non-critical and in sync with positivity. There's more than a bit to that.
2. Twitter: A daily dose of wisdom. Quit Often To Succeed In Life . Strange but once you read it, you'll be enlightened. 3. Comparative Religion. I call it as such because I do believe that different religions convey something similar in their teachings though I'm partial to Jesus and Buddha by way of upbringing and interest. And so I thought that I wasn't working as efficiently on the project to the point that it feels like walking with weights and being caught in a whirlpool at same time. I knew I had to employ a different tact to make it all work and give my best self to it. Then comes Beginner's Mind.
But what about Jesus, I silently pondered. Surely, He would have something to say about this. True enough, she was in front of me all along.
Excuse me while I go and work some more...